This Politically Correct Business…

I am confused, guys.

Like, so lost.

Somebody give me answers,

so I can ignore them.

Because I really don’t know if I want to hear any explanation other than “the world is just weird.”

 

I’m off of work today! Between my three jobs and two unofficial internet-y things I also get paid to do, that is a pretty rare occurence.

And I don’t know what to do with my life.

I already know I’m not going to work up the energy to leave my house until at least 1pm. So let’s see, what can I do while I’m here?

I could feed the cat.

I could feed myself.

I could build some shelves.

I could wash dishes.

I could read a book.

I could knit a scarf.

I’m too tired and unmotivated to do any of those things.

But I’m never too tired and unmotivated to turn on some music and dance spastically around! Seriously, never.

So I turn on my music, via Spotify, and before I can really pump out some wild moves, an ad comes on.

It said something along the lines of, “Blah blah, pads, blah, technology, blaaaaaah blegh, free samples on our website, meh.”

Whaaaaa?! Free pads? Sign me up! I try to be about that not-paying-for-things life as often as I possibly can, hence why I heard that ad in the first place.

So I go to pads.com/free, or…whatever. I fill out my infos and then I’m taken to this survey page. And this is where everything got all What The Feezy on me.

kotex survey

 

Why is numero dos even a question? Am I not on a site that sells tampons and pads? Haven’t those always been exclusively for women? Is there something going on in the world that I am not privy to yet? DO YOU MEN HAVE SOMETHING YOU’RE HIDING FROM US? Just, why why why?

 

And nobody try to justify this. I don’t want to hear it. Asking one’s gender on a survey about feminine hygiene products is completely unnecessary. Political correctness is a joke if this is what it’s all about. Please stop, you’ve gone too far.

You can say that maybe some guy is getting free samples for a girlfriend or wife or whatever…which is highly unlikely and bizarre. It’s awkward enough for men to buy some from the store. I mean out of all the questionable things you can find in a browser history, I would be really weirded out to see ubykotex.com in my boyfriend’s computer. The hell?

And yeah, I am well aware that such horrifics like this exist:

I kinda apologize for exposing you to such things. I feel like I’ve robbed you guys of your beautiful ignorance that a machine like that has ever been an idea, and even worse, an actual thing. Japan…gotta love them. But that still doesn’t justify Kotex asking me my gender. That weird, disturbing contraption still doesn’t require the use of sanitary napkins.

I mean, the survey does say it’s optional. Even on the off chance that a guy was signing up for free pads and tampons, wouldn’t they just opt out of taking the survey? What does that question even do for Kotex’s statistics? I just don’t get it.

So they ask if I’m a dude, right? But then you get to the confirmation page and, what the feezy? This message comes up:

kotex

 

But what if I want to see what other guys have to say about the product, Kotex??? What about all of those men taking your survey? So you’re just going to berate them with optional questions and then completely exclude them from the social media discussions? You sexist jerkwads. And this is why I say what I want and to hell with politcal correctness.

A random final thought, but why would I ever discuss pads with strangers on social media? What are you even going to say? That’s not what the Internet was made for, no thank you. Anyways, it’s nearing that time I promised myself to be a productive member of society, so until next time one and all.

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